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IMAGO Relationship Therapy

Imago Relationship Therapy was developed by Harville Hendrix PhD, who is the author of the bestselling book entitled "Getting the Love you Want". Dr Hendrix founded the Imago Relationship Therapy Institute in order to disseminate his successful program to professionals. The Institute now has an international membership of over 1000 therapists.

Imago therapy has positively affected thousands of couples around the world. More than one thousand therapists in nearly 40 countries are "changing the world one relationship at a time" by teaching the Imago Dialogical processes. This approach to communication comes out of new understandings about the relational paradigm, and is helpful for new couples, those together for many years, people in business relationships, and more. Imago Relationship Therapy is an effective, loving and compassionate approach to bridging the distance between you and your partner. Learning and teaching the "Imago Dialogue" allows couples to move from blame and reactivity, to understanding and empathy, so they can create a deeper and loving connection with each other.

You can experience the benefits of Imago Therapy in TWO ways: Attend a workshop or receive expert coaching in couples therapy sessions – or both! Either way, you will receive the tools, knowledge and guidance to help transform even the most difficult aspects of your relationship into opportunities for growth, healing and joy. Each of these options can augment the other, and many couples find attending both the workshop and therapy complementary and extremely beneficial. The workshop is a good option if you want to boost your Imago Therapy process or if you will find it difficult to attend regular sessions. The workshop is also a more economical option.

"Getting The Love You Want" is a weekend-long workshop designed by Dr Harville Hendrix where couples can revive and restore their love, create a vision for moving forward, and learn effective communication skills. This workshop is ideal for couples who are looking to put the spark back into their relationship and build a positive future together.

The group setting is only for teaching theory and demonstrating tools. Privacy and confidentiality is respected and you will not be expected to share any personal issues with the group. You will have time to work alone and with your partner.

"Getting The Love You Want" was designed for couples in all relationship phases, including couples who are dating, married, or on the verge of divorcing. Couples considering divorce or trying to overcome an affair can greatly benefit from this workshop, as they receive the skills and tools needed to restore their love and commitment with one another. Couples looking to refresh their love and find a sense of renewed romance also benefit from the workshop and/or therapy.

IMAGO Relationship Therapy Or The Workshop Is For You If:

  1. You want to enrich an existing good relationship
  2. You are starting a new relationship and want it to last
  3. You are tired of being in an unsatisfactory relationship and want to learn to acquire the love you want
  4. Your relationship is on the rocks and you need to make a decision about it
  5. You are in a difficult relationship and want to resolve intense conflict
When couples arrive at the consulting rooms of Imago therapists, they are often disappointed, angry, shocked and sad. They are in despair because they cannot understand how they have plummeted from the heights of love and glory into a swamp of hopelessness and conflict. Others have been married for many years and, though they have been slogging along - in calm and storm - their days of wine and roses are a dim memory.

Even if life at home is relatively peaceful, couples state that they have nothing in common anymore. The result is often that couples lead a disappointed or resentful co-existence, each with their own interests. The product then becomes a marriage of convenience or an arrangement they endure, "for the sake of the children".

Shattered dreams, whatever form they take, are painful, but there is hope because this process is part of the healthy development of every relationship. The romantic phase naturally ends and is followed by conflict and a power struggle. The key to healing lies in this awareness.

What we have to understand is that conflict is supposed to happen. Conflict has to be understood as a given, a sign that the psyche is trying to survive; trying to restore what went wrong, to get its needs met and become whole. It is only without this knowledge that conflict is destructive.

Society has institutionalised permission for divorce. It is not always necessary to leave an unhappy marriage to grow and to heal. Divorce often gets rid of the partner, but we keep the problem and carry it into the next relationship.

What you have experienced during the romantic phase of your relationship is an indication of the potential of what your relationship can be like. What is really happening when we fall in - and out - of love? What is really going on when couples fight?

To gain insight into the hidden agenda of a relationship, we have to look at the complex process of human growth and development. We all begin life in a state of relaxed and joyful bliss, with a feeling of connectedness. To remain attached, our caretakers have to be attuned to our wants and needs, always ready and able to provide warmth and safety. Then our feelings of aliveness and well-being are sustained and we remain whole.

Even in the best of circumstances, our parents are not able to maintain perfect standards, to be available every minute, to always understand exactly what is needed and to meet every demand. At times they may be tired, frustrated or struggling with problems of their own. We therefore gradually adapt to get our needs met and to survive the emotional wounds we acquire in the process. We withdraw, have temper tantrums or comply by pleasing others all the time. We threaten, manipulate, compromise or criticize. We take these survival strategies into our adult relationships to try and get our needs met.

The key to healing is in understanding our own and our partner's wounding. We often take part in re-wounding our partner because we unknowingly trigger old feelings and behaviour. Powerful healing is possible through connection. Marriage or a committed relationship, properly understood, is the therapy we need to reclaim our original wholeness.

If your relationship has not turned out the way you hoped, the good news is that a lasting, fulfilling love is completely within your reach.

In IMAGO Relationship Therapy you can learn:

  1. How to create a safe space in which your relationship can blossom and in which your children can grow up
  2. How to communicate with each other in an honest, non-defensive way
  3. To understand what triggers your partner's behaviour
  4. Why you have chosen each other
  5. How to heal old relationship and childhood wounds
  6. How to satisfy each other's important needs, while fostering each partner's individual growth
  7. How to reduce and eliminate frustrations
  8. How to step out of the power struggle and move in the direction of greater consciousness about your partner and your own needs and hurts
  9. How to rekindle romance and passion
  10. How to create a vision together

Article: EEG changes coincident with a 90-day CBT program for couples in relationship distress
               - Donald R. Du Rousseau &Theresa A Beeton


"An essential course if you want to learn more about your relationship and more about your inner self. Valuable to old and young couples "

- Rich, 16yr relationship

"Incredible tools to keep on learning from our partners and discovering why we are perfect for each other."

- Andi, 6yr relationship

"I hope every couple that wants happiness in their relationship comes to do this course"

- Ami, 3yr relationship

"Deeper understanding of my partner and the tools to use to keep us there."

- Damon, 10yr relationship

"Anyone in an intimate relationship should invest in this course, absolutely essential. "

- Jenna, 5yr relationship

"I feel like I’m going to be able to communicate with my husband in a safe place and most importantly allow him the same opportunity"

- Susie, 16yr relationship

"Incredibly enlightening experience where you gain an understanding of the source of some of your and your partners deepest fears and the impact on your relationship today."

- Anon, 2yr relationship.

"This should be compulsory for young couples about to be married and should be compulsory for couples prior to divorce! "

- Anon together for 12 yrs

"I really loved the transformation in the couples on the workshop. We entered stressed and we are leaving comfortable, holding each other’s hands and remembering that we love each other. "

- Celia married 22 yrs

"Amazing tools for growth. "

- Philip married 22 yrs

"This workshop should be compulsory for any couple looking for happiness "

- Steve married 2 yrs

"I have learnt the stages of love and the movement from Romantic love to conscious love "

- Michael married 7 yrs

"Excellent material and tools to build a solid relationship"

- Nirvash

"Providing practical tools to move forward in dialogue "

- Marilyn

"Amazing informative workshop that allowed for a safe environment to allow learning and growth "

- Vanessa

"Thank you for showing us how to make our marriage work "

- Claudia

"Gained insight into the tools required for meaningful dialogue and understanding. Given me hope for a positive future! "

- Anon

2018 Workshops:

7 and 8 April
26 and 27 May
14 and 15 July
8 and 9 September
20 and 21 October
1 and 2 December
Saturday – 08h00 to 19h00
Sunday - 08h00 to 18h30

R4700 per couple if paid via EFT and R4200 Cash
Please enquire with regards to claiming from your medical aid.

Click here to download the registration form.